


bruising the sun

by qiras



Series: reylo week 2018 [6]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (2017), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, I'M WEAK DON'T @ ME, Soulmate AU, reylo baby in the last scene, reyloweek2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-28
Updated: 2018-04-28
Packaged: 2019-04-29 06:41:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14467161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/qiras/pseuds/qiras
Summary: when you are born, the world is black and white. it stays that way until you touch your soulmate for the first time. then, it bursts into color.written for reyloweek2018 day six: soulmates





	bruising the sun

Kylo Ren saw the world in black and white. Everyone did, until they touched their soulmate for the first time and the world burst into color. His world, he swore, would never do so. He would never have a soulmate. Supreme Leader Snoke had taken pity on him, explained no one’s soul could stand prolonged contact with his maimed one, and it was better that way; he could have a better connection to the dark side that way.

Then came the girl.

He didn’t _want_ the girl, didn’t _care_ about the girl-- _Rey_ , her name is Rey. He felt nothing for her aside from desire to obtain the information he needed from her, and, surprisingly, a desire to not hurt her unless very very necessary. But that was it. Really.

It wasn’t, of course, but if one practices self-deception long enough, one becomes rather good at it.

The first time he saw her, saw the fire and steel she was forged from, he was drawn to her. Then he picked her up, held her in his arms, and as soon as he touched her, even through the barrier of his gloves, the world lit up with color.

(In retrospect, he is sure that is the minute that Snoke was finished. He knew then that the Supreme Leader could not be right about soulmates, because now he knew his soulmate’s hair was brown and her lips were pink and she was even more beautiful in color, and how could seeing the green of trees and blue of skies be wrong? No, Snoke must be just as wrong about soulmates as the Jedi had been.)

 

 

Rey woke in an interrogation room, and still she saw the world in black and white. She fought Kylo Ren in a snowy forest and did not see the red of his lightsaber. She left the Resistance and went to Ahch-To and did not see the green of the island. She spoke with Kylo Ren through a strange bond and did not see the blue-gray of the rainy sky.

Then she found herself alone, more alone than she’d ever been before, and so she spoke to Ben. And he whispered, like it was something meant only for her ears, that she wasn’t alone, and she stretched her hand out to him because he wasn’t either, and she had to show him.

This time, he removed his glove, bared himself to her, and she touched him, and the world burst into color.

Ben’s hands were pale and ivory and the fire was gold and Ben’s eyes were a beautiful, dark brown. She wanted to drown in them because, oh, of course he was her soulmate; it felt... right. Maybe part of her had always known, had known from the moment she’d met him.

Then Luke broke in and the world flew apart and Ben was gone, and now she sees. She sees the gray of the storm and the blue of Luke’s eyes as he tells her this won’t end how she thinks it will. She sees red in the throne room, red from the guards and Ben’s saber and the walls, sees the gold of Snoke’s robes and watches the blue cut through them as Ben saves her.

And Rey sees orange fire again, raining down around them this time as Ben asks her to join him and she must say no because who would she be if she said yes?

(The colors of heartbreak flash behind her eyes, and it’s all the colors she’s seen in the last few hours, all the reminders of everything she’s losing. Funny. Heartbreak affects everything. She must have forgotten that.)

 

 

Ben wakes in a throne room alone, surrounded by red and black, fire and destruction, and maybe, he thinks, maybe Snoke was right, and maybe no one should be forced to be a mate for his soul, battered and disfigured as it is. She left him. She didn’t want him. She didn’t love him.

He should be used to that by now.

Still it hurts, and the hurt fuels him as they follow the Resistance to Crait. He watches the white planet turn bright red as he faces his uncle holding the jewel-blue lightsaber _Rey must have given him_. That betrayal is almost unbearable, until Luke isn't really there and neither is the saber and Ben _hates_ red, he decides. It seems to be the color that surrounds all his heartbreak.

He kneels again, looking up at Rey, beautiful Rey, standing in the light as she always should, dark blue clothing only making her look more beautiful (he doesn’t even have a name for all the colors in her eyes), and he clutches his father’s gold dice in one hand and suddenly, he is fiercely lonely again, even though she promised he wasn’t alone, and something deep inside of him aches.

 

 

Rey wakes in a dark room. She wakes up in the middle of the night regularly now, and she’s decided she doesn’t like the dark. Seeing color is not something she may take for granted; she never wants to live in a world lacking color (lacking Ben) ever again. She sees the sliver of golden light falling across the bedroom floor and, with some effort, pulls herself out of bed. He _would_ have gotten up without her.

She enters the other bedroom and leans against the doorway for just a moment, watching. Ben holding their child is still one of the most beautiful scenes she’s ever been fortunate enough to witness. He turns slowly, Myriam held firmly against his chest, wrapped in her little purple blanket, her little breaths puffing against the side of his neck.

“Did she wake?” Rey asks.

“No,” Ben says, “but I had to...”

“I know,” she says, crossing the room to lean against her husband. He had to get up, of course he did, had to make sure they were both really there, this was _real_. He shifts Myriam and wraps his arm around Rey’s waist. “I love you,” she says.

He presses a kiss to her hair. “I love you too.”

Together, they stand in their daughter’s room and watch the colors of the sunrise.


End file.
